This is a repost from an entry I did on Substack. Which moving forward going to keep the blog on WordPress while Substack will stay with newsletter and writing content.
I didn’t plan to disappear
At first I missed a week, then another, next thing it became normal. Things got heavy, my last blog was from March 22 I never got to talk about the ultra or finish the build up to that. Life and stress built up, and I gave in to the resistance.
The turning point was just realizing that my mental health wasn’t trending in a direction I wanted. I was getting things done but just juggling too many things, pushing myself to burnout. I really was trying to balance everything:
- Fatherhood
- Husband
- Work
- Running/training
- Reading/reviews
- Writing
- Finances
- Mental Health
- Multiple social media accounts
All these different hats take up time, finding how to prioritize everything was insane. Being a father. Being a husband. Trying to stay consistent with training, running, workouts, and pushing myself. Keeping up with reading and learning. Managing the day-to day responsibilities of the house.
Somewhere along the way, I stopped giving myself space to actually carry all of it. I was moving from task to task, role to role, without resetting. No real pause. No time to process. Just forward motion because that’s what needed to happen. From the time I woke up until going to bed it was nonstop.
That kind of pace works for a while.
Then it doesn’t.
For me, it showed up as silence. No writing. No creativity. Just doing what had to be done each day and leaving everything else behind. Started to stop tracking habits after over a year of progress. Putting my head down to just grind through the days.
That’s when I knew something had to change. I had to find a way to make it work. Time is limited and can only do so much every day without burning out. What I experienced was pure overload.
So this is me coming back, but with a different mindset. Less pressure to do everything perfectly. Putting focus on the things that I want to be doing (even though I want to do it all).
Showing up for my family without feeling like I’m falling behind somewhere else. Finding the time to train but not drain, making time to learn, read, and write. Even in this absence of writing, I have been journaling consistently exploring myself more.
This blog is going to reflect that. Life isn’t polished, it is a balancing act. Some days things just flow, others not so much but that is ok. I am working on not getting hung up on if I don’t do something. Focus is on how to be consistent and present in the things I am doing.
No perfect system. No unrealistic expectations. Just learning how to manage the stress better and keep moving forward without losing myself in the process.
If you’re still here, I appreciate it.
I’m not coming back with everything figured out. I’m coming back learning how to handle it all without burning out again.
If you have ever experienced something similar, I would love to hear the story!
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